Making friends by Andrew Matthews Chapter 1/6

This book is great~!Its mainly about communicating with ppl~ Most of the points make sense. I hope to share with you all~ Do try to read the actual book as it is written in a very interesting way. I will be writting in chapters form. Total there is 6 chapter.

Chapter 1: You and others
1. WE ALL GET NERVOUS. Most ppl are more scared than we are. Eg: You spot a glamorous girl call Jane in a party and u think that she is calm and confident but in Jane's mind she is wondering whether, "Does ppl think its weird that i am sitting by myself or am i unattractive." Sometimes we think that WE ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH. Few ppl have confidence that they appear to have. Eg: u have neighbour that u never talk to and conclude they are snob. In actual u were frighten to say hello and figure THEY have prob. They were scared to say hello cos they reasoned YOU had a prob.

2. When we have bad habit we are the last to know. If u want to improve then ask the ppl u can trust. Tell them that u want to improve urself and want their total honesty.

3. If we ONLY SEE OUR FAULTS, WE EXPECT THAT OTHERS WILL SEE ONLY OUR FAULTS. Eg. u are insecure about ur look and think that ur gf will look for a new bf so u always nag at her. As a result, u are so engrous in ur prob that u forget to care about her. IF U DONT LIKE YOURSELF, YOU WONT BELIEVE THAT ANYONE ELSE WOULD LIKE YOU! So ask urself that, "do u want to lift urself up or pull urself down?" COMPARING OURSELVES IS A TRAP. There will always be someone richer, smarter, wittier than we are. So we need to stop measure ourselves against others but begin by setting goals and target which make sense to us. we measure our growth this year in term of last year.

4. Taking ourselves too seriously. John worn a beard for many years n decide to shave. But he is self conscious about making change and wondered what other ppl will think. When he go to the office no one gave reaction. During lunch he could not stand it any longer and ask, "what do u think of my new look." His fren give him a blank stare and say that he had a new mustache. THINGS THAT ARE HUGELY IMPORTANT TO US DONT MATTER A JOT TO OTHERS. Brian has a pimple his nose and hid in his hse 4 a week. Who cares?